Two Roads Diverged
by Casting Aspersions
Summary: To be or not to be, that is the question. AU end of season 3.
1. Chapter 1

**Summary:** To be or not to be, that is the question. AU end of season 3.

**Disclaimer:** These characters are not mine. They are the creation of Amy Sherman-Palladino.

**Author's notes:** Many thanks to **NicoleMack** for her excellent beta-ing.

**Part One: To be…**

_It began with a grumpy diner proprietor, an annoying woman desperate for coffee and a horoscope. The story of Luke and Lorelai was not one of love at first sight, or even second sight. It started with irritation, grudging acceptance followed, and slowly a friendship developed. For many years there was friendship and nothing more: Luke liked Lorelai and Lorelai liked Luke. Though precisely what they felt for each other was anyone's guess._

_The Stars Hollow townsfolk had debated this very point for many hours behind their respective closed doors without reaching any definitive conclusions. The general opinion though, was that eventually Lorelai and Luke would get together, and more than one person thought the first time would be on a table, like in Bull Durham (head theorist: Sookie St James). In fact, at that point, Lorelai probably could not even begin to classify exactly what her feelings were for Luke. And Luke, well, he'd become a world class champion of denial._

_So for a long time, they were friends and only friends. And then they weren't. Kind of like in 'When Harry Met Sally', without the sex (damn it). Because Lorelai had a daughter, called Rory, and Luke had a nephew named Jess and they were both in a car accident. The end result was one broken arm, one nephew shipped back to his mother, one epic fight, four (or a million, depending on who you believe) apologies and one Lorelai Gilmore ignored by one Luke Danes. And so, for a while, Luke and Lorelai were not friends, and Luke's arctic behavior almost precipitated the next ice age._

_Depending on your perspective, cue the villain music or inspiring heroic overture and enter Christopher Hayden, father of Rory and absent for most of her life (Finding himself? Deadbeat? Your call). Lorelai had spent years waiting for him to grow up (although given his age he really should have finished maturing a long time ago), dreaming of a 'real family' consisting of mother, father, daughter, matching jogging suits; Volvo optional. So when Christopher (sort of) broke up with his girlfriend and (definitely) slept with Lorelai, she thought this was it: this was the whole package. But Christopher's ex-girlfriend was pregnant, so Lorelai and Rory were left alone (again). Then Jess returned, Lorelai moved to put Chris behind her once and for all and Luke and Lorelai were friends again._

_The story of Luke and Lorelai becomes somewhat obscured at this point by that common curse: the teen love triangle (see also: Dawson's Creek). What was apparent, was that although their friendship had returned, they were still no closer to any kind of Bull Durham related table activity. Lorelai was busy dealing with Christopher related fallout, ex-fiancé Max related fallout and dating Alex, a man who was apparently so memorable that even Lorelai failed to remember him a month later. Meanwhile Luke was occupied with trying to control the poor man's James Dean (aka Jess) and dating a woman who was perhaps a little on the bland side of the spectrum, lawyer Nicole "I like cheese" Leahy._

_As the year progressed, Jess left Stars Hollow behind and allowed us to bid him so long, farewell, auf weidersehen, good-bye (Von Trapp Family singers an optional extra). By the time of Rory's graduation, Alex had disappeared without a trace, though Nicole was regrettably still present. With summer looming, Luke and Lorelai would be further apart than ever before, with Lorelai in Europe with Rory and Luke on a cruise with Nicole._

_For seven years there had been moments and near misses and unacknowledged opportunities, each of them in their own way a fork in the road, the eternal question of whether it was 'to be or not to be'. Each time that fork had led down the road of friendship…it was not to be. And so, on the day of Rory's graduation, it came down to this: Luke and Lorelai had a conversation, and Luke hoped for a sign, any sign, that Lorelai felt anything other than friendship for him. Luke told her he was having second thoughts about the cruise with Nicole, and asked Lorelai whether she thought it was okay for him to go…considering everything. In return she replied:_

_"Yeah, I do."_

_It wasn't the answer he was hoping for. Yet again it seemed that it was not to be._

_But maybe, this time it_ was.

* * *

The words of his conversation with Lorelai echoed in Luke's mind as he drove back towards Stars Hollow following Rory's graduation. _Good one, Danes,_ he thought to himself, a bitter knot of barely acknowledged disappointment developing in his gut as he considered her words. What exactly had he been hoping Lorelai would say? Had he been hoping she would ask him not to go? Not a chance in hell of that happening. He received exactly the answer he'd subconsciously known she would give.

When Nicole first proposed the idea of going on a cruise a month or two ago, he had not been particularly keen on the idea. He was a small town guy. He liked to be in his comfort zone and Stars Hollow was that zone. But Nicole had persisted and they were getting on well and in the end he agreed to go. He enjoyed spending time with her and thought that maybe, given enough time, there could be a future for them. Which was fine in theory, until Lorelai brought up Love Boats and proposals and he was hit with a sudden fear that Nicole was going to be expecting things that he wasn't ready for. Commitment, marriage… change. He didn't do any better with change than he did with travel.

Change was unsettling and disturbing and where change applied to him anyway, it was never a change for the better. So he went to the graduation still undecided about whether he would take the trip. After all, why risk taking things to the next level with Nicole when he wasn't sure it was a level he could commit to anyway? When he asked Lorelai that question, he honestly couldn't have explained what impulse had possessed him to speak about it to her. But then, when it came to him and Lorelai, little really ever made sense. What he did know now was how disappointed he had felt when she told him to go.

Luke sighed in frustration as he drove into the alley behind the diner and parked the truck. He gave brief thought to helping Caesar with the afternoon rush, but in the end sought the solitude of his apartment upstairs. Walking into the bathroom, he quickly changed out of the uncomfortable formal wear he so rarely wore and once more donned his familiar flannelled attire. Then he bent over the basin, tossing water across his face before reaching for a towel. As he dried his face, Luke stared solemnly at the reflection in the mirror. He saw a well worn face in need of a shave. A receding hairline and tired eyes completed the unappealing picture. The sarcastic thought echoed in his mind: yeah, he was a real catch all right. He was almost forty, still wearing the same kind of flannel he had worn seven years earlier; still looking in the same mirror as he had seven years ago; about to go down to do the same work in the same diner as he had for the last seven years. Seven years since he had first met Lorelai and not a damn thing had changed. He looked old and what was more, he felt old. Life was passing him by and if he didn't do something about it he would be seventy and still staring into this same mirror, alone and lonely without a single person to care whether he lived or died. It was a depressing thought.

Looking away from the reflection, Luke left the bathroom and crossed to the fridge to pull out a beer, twisting off the cap as he sat down at the table. He gripped the chilly neck of the bottle and took a swig, before setting it back down. Staring solemnly at the drops of condensation that slid down the glass before pooling on the table, Luke felt the weight of the day's events, and the weight of years of unfulfilled expectation settling over him. He wasn't given to feeling sorry for himself, but today he felt like wallowing. Today, it seemed like it was the end of whatever slim hope he had held onto that Lorelai felt something for him other than friendship.

As he took another swig of beer, Luke considered the question that he had asked Lorelai again. _Do you think it's okay…you know…considering everything_. He couldn't deny the sharp disappointment he had felt when she told him to go. The truth was that he asked that question because he wanted Lorelai to tell him to stay. But when it came to Lorelai Gilmore however, he was never going to get the answer he was looking for. Seven years and all of those times when he could have said something and it still came down to this: he wouldn't say what he truly wanted to say and she never understood the question he was trying to ask her.

In many ways he really only had himself to blame. He'd just never discovered the way to get any further than friendship with Lorelai. A few times, years ago now, he tried to ask her out, but the timing never seemed right and in the end there was always an excuse to chicken out. He spent years trying to deny it; trying to pretend it didn't exist, but really it was something he'd always known. He wanted Lorelai, not as a friend, but as much more than that. And although he strained to find a flicker of doubt or restraint in Lorelai's words during their last conversation, they hadn't been there. It was time to put that confusing relationship into the light it always had been and always would be: plain and simple friendship. Lorelai Gilmore wanted a guy like Max, or most probably a guy like Christopher…but she had never wanted Luke Danes and it seemed she never would. She wanted his friendship and nothing more than that and it was time to face that fact.

Luke's gaze fell on Jess' abandoned bed for a moment and he stood up, crossing to sit down heavily on the couch to avoid looking at that symbol of his other great failure. The truth was depressing: he was failing. He was so tired of it: tired of failing to share his feelings with Lorelai, tired of failing with Jess. Tired of hoping for things that would never happen. He wanted more than the daily grind of running the diner and nights filled with reminders of those who had left him behind, or who had never been his at all.

Luke slowly drank the beer, running over the last few years of his life dispassionately in his mind. It wasn't a bad life, really, but it could certainly be better. By the time he drained the last few drops from the bottle, he had reached a conclusion of sorts. He wanted more than what he had. It was time to stop hoping for things that wouldn't happen and go after the things that were possible. Nicole wanted him. He wasn't entirely sure why, but she did. While he couldn't exactly say he was madly in love with her as he had been with Rachel all those years ago, it still felt real. It felt safe. Most importantly, it felt like something that was within his grasp. So now the question was, what was he willing to do about it?

He could start by going on the cruise with Nicole, for one thing. Who cared about proposals and Love Boats? He would go and he would have a good time and forget about Stars Hollow and all of its residents for a few weeks and actually make an effort for once. And as he sat there, seriously considering the future for the first time in a long time, Lorelai's mocking about proposals suddenly didn't seem like a joke anymore. It really was the ultimate way to move on. Was he ready to ask Nicole to marry him? He found it hard to imagine himself holding out a ring and asking that question.

Moving over towards his safe, Luke spun the combination rapidly and reached to the back to pull out the jewelry box that had been sitting there for many years now. Returning to the couch, Luke opened the box and stared at the ring nestled there. It was his mother's ring, although it belonged to Liz now. It had never really been to Liz's taste and she left it behind when she left all those years ago, though he assumed she would be back to get it one day. He stared at the ring, trying to imagine himself going into a shop and picking one out for Nicole. He tried to imagine giving her that ring and asking her that question. Was he really ready for marriage? A feeling of panic coursed through him and Luke snapped the box shut with a sigh. No, maybe he wasn't ready for marriage yet. But he would go on the cruise, and have a good time with Nicole and maybe when they got back he'd be ready to go shopping for a ring and be ready to ask that question. At the very least, he would stop hoping in vain for things he would never get.

A sudden crash of dishes down below in the diner snapped Luke out of his reverie. Perhaps leaving Caesar alone with the afternoon rush hadn't been very wise after all. Pushing himself up from the couch, Luke moved towards the door. He dropped the ring box on the kitchen table as he passed by and then headed downstairs.

* * *

The bell above the door to the diner rang one last time several hours later as the final customers of the day departed. Luke locked the door behind them before turning back to clear away the remaining dishes from the tables. He was crossing to the counter when he heard a tapping on the door. Turning around to gesture to the 'CLOSED' sign on the door, he saw that it was Lorelai peering through the open blinds. Frowning in confusion, he crossed rapidly to the door and opened it, standing aside to allow Lorelai to enter. She was holding two food laden bags from Doose's and he inwardly groaned when he considered how much junk food those two bags were likely to contain.

"What's up?" he asked curiously. "Aren't you and Rory supposed to be on a plane getting ready to annoy some European cafe owner rather than me?"

"Hi Luke, so nice to see you're missing us already," Lorelai responded as she brushed past him and dumped the bags onto a table. "We don't head out until tomorrow night and Lane is having some sort of crisis that she wants to consult Rory on. I left them holed up in Rory's room having a council of war and went in search of supplies." Lorelai gestured to the bags before continuing, "For once I'm not here for coffee, though I'm sure I could be persuaded if some kindly person were to offer some. Actually, Rory was looking for her copy of Anna Karenina. She wants to take it while we're traveling but she thinks Jess may have had it. Is there any chance we could take a look upstairs?"

Luke stiffened momentarily at the mention of Jess, but nodded in response to Lorelai's query. Jess had left a pile of junk behind that he hadn't had the heart to pack up yet, so it was quite likely the book was there. "Yeah, he did leave a bunch of stuff. Come on up and I'll see if I can find it."

He walked up the stairs to his apartment, and opened the door for Lorelai. As she passed by him, he gestured to a box sitting on a chair. "You check out there, I'll check near his bed."

He made his way over to the pile of books that had been a constant fixture beside Jess' bed in the months that he had lived there and began to sort through them. He could hear Lorelai rummaging through the box, but she apparently came up empty as she gave up the search and wandered off elsewhere. As she did so, she called across to him curiously. "So Luke, when are you heading off for the cruise?"

Only half paying attention to her question, Luke replied distractedly, "In about a week. Nicole is calling with final details later tonight." He trailed off as he spotted the rogue book. "There it is."

Lorelai was standing a foot away from the table with her back to him and he crossed to her, holding out the book. She didn't seem to notice though and he realized her gaze was fixed on the jewelry box on the kitchen table. Damn it, he had forgotten about that. Setting the book on the table he reached forward to grab the box, but he was beaten by Lorelai, who picked it up and waved it in his direction.

"Hey Luke, is it Nicole's birthday or something? Was the Chat Club closed, so you graduated to jewelry instead? I'm impressed. I hope your present shopping skills have improved though, cause there's nothing worse than…"

Her words faded as she opened the box and he watched the expression on her face change abruptly when she saw the ring inside.

"Luke, what is this?" she asked, the shock evident in her voice.

"Nothing," he said gruffly, moving towards her to try to pull the box from her grasp.

Lorelai held the box firmly in her hand however and moved further away from him. "Does this mean what I think it means?" she asked, looking up at him, her next words seeming more of a statement than a question. "You're going to propose to Nicole."

Embarrassed by his earlier musings on that very subject, and unwilling to explain himself to Lorelai of all people, he shrugged halfheartedly and waited stoically for the mocking to commence. It never did though and Lorelai seemed perfectly serious as she stared at him in silence.

"Lorelai?" Luke questioned uncertainly, unable to decipher the significance of her response. But then she snapped out of whatever trance she had been in and closed the box before tightening her hand around it. Shaking it in his direction, she burst out abruptly, "Luke, have you lost your mind?"

"What?" he asked in bewilderment.

"A few hours ago you were saying that going on a cruise was too much commitment and now suddenly you're going to propose? What happened? Did you spend one too many hours in Kirk's company and finally go completely and utterly insane?"

Stung by her words Luke retorted, "Well I changed my mind, okay?"

Lorelai's words almost ran together as she threw back them at him, "No, it's not okay. You can't do this, I won't let you."

"Let me?" he asked, staring back at her in confusion, as his irritation started to build. "I don't need your permission. This is none of your business."

"It's absolutely my business, Luke," Lorelai replied, anger now apparent in her voice. "I'm your friend and I won't let you make a mistake like this. For god's sake you've only known Nicole a few months. You're not thinking clearly. You can't go off on a cruise and propose to her. It's stupid."

"Hey," he cut her off abruptly. "You told me to go. You thought it was a good idea."

"I never told you to propose," she retorted. "And you know what? The cruise is a bad idea too. I don't think you should go."

"Too late," he returned shortly. "I'm going and I'm proposing and I can do what I damned well like. I'm still going to be there to serve you coffee and burgers, so what does it matter to you?"

"It matters," Lorelai replied quickly. "You'll get married and then…then you'll move. You'll get a place in Litchfield or Woodbridge or something and you'll have to pick out paint colors which I know for a fact you hate. And you'll have to commute there and back every day. Luke Danes and road rage. That's a real healthy combination. And then your cooking will suffer. You'll make awful coffee and burn your food 'cause you're late or irritated or whatever, and that's bad for business. You'll run out of money, and you'll close down the diner and I'll be left with nowhere to eat breakfast. This is a dumb thing to do and you're going to regret it."

"Unbelievable," Luke shook his head in irritation now. "I can't believe you're making _my life_ all about you." He looked across at Lorelai for a moment before throwing his hands up in exasperation. "You know what? I don't care what you think. Despite what you may think my life doesn't revolve around the thirty minutes a day you spend in the diner."

"I know that," Lorelai replied hastily, taking a step in his direction. "But I think you're making a mistake. This is a big thing to do, Luke. This'll change your life and I don't think you're ready."

"Ready? Oh well, Lorelai Gilmore doesn't think I'm ready. Well yeah, definitely changing my mind then," he replied sarcastically. He crossed to stand directly in front of Lorelai as he mockingly continued, "Do you want to tell me what shirt I should wear today, what time I should get up in the morning, how many cases of pickles I need to order? I'll make sure to run every decision by you, like you have any right to tell me at all. Because you've always made such great choices in the past."

Luke's rant trailed off when he saw a hurt expression briefly cross Lorelai's face. He felt a stab of guilt and some of his anger began to drain away. Rubbing a hand across his face wearily, Luke sighed heavily before continuing, "You know what? I'm done talking to you about this. Just give me the ring and you go have fun with Rory in Europe and I'll go live my life too."

He held out his hand for the box, but she shook her head and spoke to him firmly as she added, "No Luke, I'm not letting you do this. This ring," she held up the box and backed away to the door, "is coming with me."

He crossed the distance to the door in two long strides, reaching it before she could and slamming it shut with one hand. As he did so, he placed himself bodily between Lorelai and the door, preventing her escape. She stopped a foot away from him, staring up at him with a perplexed frown on her face.

"What do you think you're doing?" she demanded. "I want to leave."

"Just give me the ring and then you can do what you like," Luke replied, holding out his hand for the box that Lorelai was now clutching to her chest.

He wouldn't have been surprised if Lorelai threw the ring at him, but her grip on the box simply tightened and she let out an irritated sigh as she muttered to him, "No, I won't. You're making a big mistake."

He let out a frustrated breath and spoke again as he looked at her downcast face. "I don't understand why is this so important to you." He paused for a moment, waiting for a response, but none was forthcoming. So finally he asked the question he'd been burning to ask since they'd started this argument. "Why do you care so much, Lorelai?"

He wasn't sure what reaction he'd expected, but he was astonished by her response. She suddenly froze in place and for once in her life she seemed bereft of words, her mouth opening and closing several times. For a long moment there was silence as Luke waited in vain for an answer to his question. Then Lorelai's shoulders seemed to slump in defeat and she reached out to place the box in his still outstretched hand. She wasn't going to answer him, Luke realized and reflexively closed his hand around hers. Lorelai struggled briefly to remove her hand, before becoming still as she stared down at their joined hands.

A pleading note entered Luke's voice as he looked down at her downcast face and asked again, "Why do you care?"

As he repeated the question, Lorelai finally lifted her gaze to his and he was shocked to see the vulnerable and hurt expression on her face. For a moment the world seemed to still and then suddenly hope flooded in. Was this reaction something other than some kind of weird dog in the manger-like possessiveness? Did she actually have feelings for him after all? She was staring up at him, her liquid blue eyes displaying a mix of emotions he'd never seen before. The world faded away and he forgot everything except the fact that he was standing a foot away from the woman he had wanted for so long.

He became acutely aware of their hands still clasped between them. Taking a steadying breath, Luke loosened his grip on Lorelai's hand and tentatively began to trace his thumb back and forward across her hand, waiting with bated breath for her reaction. She drew in a deep breath but remained standing where she was, showing no inclination to pull away. Encouraged, Luke gently pulled their linked hands towards his face. Eyes never leaving hers, he dropped a lingering kiss onto the back of her hand and then another. He felt a mixture of elation and relief when he felt her hand tremble a little beneath his lips.

Luke loosened his grip on Lorelai's hand, barely noticing as the ring box fell to the floor between them with a dull thud. He let go of Lorelai's hand completely, stepped a little closer to her and, after a moment's hesitation, cupped her cheek. She stood there, gazing up at him with wide open eyes, but did not back away. For one last moment he hesitated, staring down into her face, then he finally gathered his courage and cautiously closed the remaining gap between them. His eyes drifted closed and he kissed Lorelai for the first time. He moved his lips tentatively over hers for a few short seconds, savoring the incredible feeling of her lips under his; the reality much better than anything he could have ever imagined. Her lips were soft and sweet and she tasted like heaven. As he pulled away slightly to gauge her reaction, he dropped his hand from her face and settled it at her waist.

He watched Lorelai draw in a deep breath, utterly silent as she met his gaze again. He waited, needing for her to be the one to make the next move, whatever it would be. When she did move, it was to step forward to place one hand on his chest. As she raised her face, he lowered his, responding to her feather light touch and kissing her briefly once, twice and then a third time before parting again. As he pulled away to stare once more into Lorelai's eyes, Luke was aware of nothing but the woman standing before him. He'd just kissed Lorelai. He kissed her and she hadn't run away. It was the only comprehensible thought that Luke could process as he stood there, hypnotized by her luminous eyes.

For one last moment he was immobile and then clarity abruptly returned. He wanted more. Luke moved forward quickly, his hands locking around Lorelai's waist as he hauled her close to him. He barely noticed his baseball cap being knocked from his head as he felt Lorelai wrap her arms around his neck and their lips met once more. There was nothing gentle to the kiss this time and Luke angled his head to deepen it immediately, his tongue seeking entrance to Lorelai's mouth. She opened her mouth with a gasp and he groaned into the kiss when he felt her tongue pushing back at his eagerly.

As he hungrily kissed her, Luke maneuvered Lorelai back until she was pressed against the door, his hands roaming restlessly over her body. He felt one of her hands sliding down his back to his hip, urging him ever closer to her. In response, Luke tangled a hand in her silky hair to pull her face closer to his and spread his other hand across her lower back, pulling her hard up against his growing arousal. For long moments they were kissing fervently, until Luke broke away to trail urgent kisses along Lorelai's jaw and down to her neck, pulling eagerly at her collar to allow him better access. He thought he might lose his mind when he heard Lorelai gasping his name, her hand clutching convulsively at his flannelled shirt.

But even as he continued his heady exploration of the sensitive skin at the juncture of Lorelai's neck, Luke gradually became aware of a faint ringing in the room. It was the phone, and at first he tried to ignore it, cupping Lorelai's face as he blindly sought out her lips again. But as they deepened the kiss once more, the answering machine was activated and then Nicole's voice rang out through the confines of the apartment. They both froze immediately and guilt and confusion abruptly swept Luke's desire away. He released Lorelai and staggered backwards away from her. As Nicole left a brief message and then hung up, he stared at Lorelai in silence.

Luke drew in rapid breaths as he gazed at Lorelai for long moments, unable to move or to say anything as he took in the image of her flushed features, her own rapid breathing and her kiss-swollen lips. She was leaning against the door, but then took a step away. When she staggered for a moment, Luke moved towards her, his hand coming out to steady her but she held out a hand and shook her head.

"Lorelai," Luke ground her name out unsteadily and he took another step towards her. He stopped however when she spoke a single word.

"Don't."

The word was barely above a whisper, but he heard it and it froze him to the marrow. He followed the direction of Lorelai's gaze and saw that she was looking down at the ring box on the floor. Guilt coursed through him again at the reminder of Nicole, and Lorelai's hand came up to cover her mouth as she stared at the box. For one long moment they both stood there frozen, and then Lorelai was turning around to yank the door open, before she ran down the stairs.

For a shocked second, Luke remained frozen in place, then he moved rapidly out of the door, calling down the stairs, "Lorelai, wait." He heard the front door to the diner slam and began to hurry after her. He came abruptly to a halt when he reached the bottom step however, suddenly realizing it would be no use to go after Lorelai now. He couldn't chase her through town when every busybody within a twelve block radius might be watching them with an eagle eye. What exactly was he going to do, burst in on Lorelai at her home and explain to Rory and Lane why he was there? And what about Nicole? She didn't deserve this behavior from him.

"Damn it," he muttered, dropping to sit down on the stairs. He took a steadying breath to calm the rapid beating of his heart and then buried his face in his shaking hands, overcome with guilt and confusion. What on earth was he going to do now?

_To be continued_


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** Still not mine.

**A/N:** Thanks again to NicoleMack for her comments on this chapter.

**Part Two: Or not to be…**

Lorelai shifted restlessly in her airplane seat, trying in vain to find a comfortable position. The cabin lights were dimmed and it seemed that everyone had managed to find a way into dreamland but her. Turning her head in the direction of the window seat, a brief smile flickered across her face. Rory was fast asleep, her face resting uncomfortably against the window, and the book she had been reading earlier was still clutched precariously in one hand. Reaching across, Lorelai withdrew the book gently from Rory's grasp and slid it into the pocket in the seat in front of her. Pulling the blanket more securely across Rory's lap, she then settled back in her own seat and stared at the back of the seat in front of her.

She couldn't believe she was finally here. It was eighteen years later than she had originally planned, but this trip would be far better than anything she could have anticipated back then. If her parents had paid for her to go to Europe all those years ago, they would have insisted she stay in five star hotels, far removed from the sights she truly wanted to see. But this trip was her and Rory and they were going to be traveling the way that they wanted. It was the culmination of many years of planning and anticipation and she would have it no other way.

It wasn't excitement about the coming trip that was keeping her awake now though. She'd spent today vainly trying to prevent the events of last night from occupying her every waking moment. While they were running around doing last minute packing, and while Rory was awake to talk to, it had been easy to push those troubling thoughts away. But now there were no distractions and all she could think about was Luke. She was still in a morass of confusion as to exactly what had happened. In the afternoon, life had seemed so simple. She had been filled with anticipation for the coming trip and overcome with pride in Rory's achievements. Then, a few hours later, all of that was swept away by arguments and confusion and frantic kisses.

Lorelai shifted uncomfortably in her seat again as she recalled opening the jewelry box and seeing that ring. During her conversation with Luke at Rory's graduation, she never suspected that he had been planning to propose. In fact he seemed reluctant to even go on the cruise. She knew that she had never been Nicole's greatest fan, but she did seem to make Luke happy, so Lorelai swallowed that dislike and told him to go. She could ignore the slightly uncomfortable feeling she got in her stomach when she thought about Nicole by telling herself that it was just a holiday after all and hardly a big commitment. The thought that Luke could be close to proposing to Nicole had never, for a second, crossed her mind, particularly given the nature of their conversation at the graduation. What on earth had changed in those few hours between then and her arrival at the diner?

Regardless of his motivation, when she saw that ring it was as if she'd suddenly forgotten how to breathe. For a moment she felt nothing, as if she was strangely divorced from reality, but then panic had flooded through her and she was tripping over herself in her haste to tell him it was a mistake. It was absolutely none of her business and yet still she told him exactly what she thought. She couldn't let a friend make the foolish mistake of proposing to a woman he'd only known for a few months. At least that's what she told herself when she first saw that ring. But as the argument continued, she was overcome by the realization that this was not really about Nicole at all.

When he asked that question, "Why do you care," the answer that had immediately entered her mind was that if he married another woman, she would have lost her chance. She had been shocked to realize that maybe the reason she didn't want Luke to marry Nicole was because she wanted to be with him herself. She should have run as soon as those thoughts occurred to her. But when she looked into his eyes, she found herself unable to just walk away. He touched her, and then he kissed her. Then she kissed him…they kissed each other. If the phone hadn't rung, they would probably have ended up doing a hell of a lot more than that.

Lorelai lifted a hand to trace her fingertips across her lips, her face flushing at the memory of Luke's lips on hers. She could still feel the rasp of his stubble against her face and his hands caressing her body and she couldn't get the image of him pressing her up against the wall out of her mind. What she remembered most vividly though was the hopeful way that he had looked at her, as if she were his dream come true. Every time she closed her eyes he was there, and he was the reason she couldn't sleep now. Last night, in the space of fifteen minutes, Luke had been transformed from her coffee supplier, her all round go-to guy and one of her closest friends to a man she wanted in so many ways that it scared the hell out of her.

It was starting to dawn on her that although Luke was a good friend and she didn't ever want to lose their friendship, she wanted much more than that. She'd managed to fool herself for years, but after what had happened yesterday she could no longer deny that a large part of her was eager for more. Eager to kiss Luke again; eager to have him in her bed and in her life. But equally, she was afraid to let that happen. If it didn't work she would lose a close friend and one of the places in the world where she felt most at home. She didn't know if she was ready to risk that for a chance at a relationship with Luke. Her track record with relationships was terrible and she couldn't stand for Luke to end up on that casualty list.

Did he even want it himself? He had been planning to propose to another woman, after all. Lorelai's grip on the blanket that covered her tightened for a moment when she thought of the possibility of Luke still proposing to Nicole. He couldn't do that now could he? Surely he couldn't kiss her like that and then leave with Nicole a few days later. She certainly hadn't had the courage to venture back to the diner today. But then, Luke hadn't sought her out either, and perhaps that was for the best. She needed time and distance to come to terms with what had happened. She tried to reassure herself that Luke would still be there when she got back. What happened between them had been too intense and overwhelming for it to have meant nothing to him.

She couldn't think about this anymore; that suffocating nervous feeling was too much to deal with. Lorelai drew in a deep, calming breath and reached over to pick up the book that Rory had been reading earlier, opening it to the first page. Now really wasn't the time to be thinking about this anyway. For the moment, she would concentrate on the thrill of the journey before her and forget all about him. She had six weeks to come to a decision and she would consider the situation with Luke at some, as yet undetermined, point in the future.

* * *

"Oh my god, that was good," Rory groaned as she pushed her plate away slightly and leaned back in her chair.

Lorelai nodded enthusiastically as she ate the last mouthful of food from her plate. "You remember when we had four Thanksgiving meals?" she queried and Rory nodded in response. "I think Italians must do that every day of their lives."

They'd just eaten their way through four courses of Italian cuisine while sitting at an outdoor café in the imposing presence of the Pantheon in Rome. The tables, shaded by white canvas umbrellas, were packed with both tourists and Italians alike and the chatter of a dozen different languages filled the air. The piazza they were in was an odd mix of the ancient and modern, the columned behemoth of the Pantheon standing shoulder to shoulder with buildings that were covered in large billboards advertising fast food.

Lorelai leant back in her chair. "Okay, I think if I eat another thing, I will literally explode."

"But what a way to go," Rory replied contentedly.

This was going to be the best trip ever Lorelai decided happily, before she was distracted by what appeared to be a heated argument developing at the next table. Two elderly Italians, each sporting a portly stomach that attested to their champion eating habits, were speaking loudly, their hands gesturing wildly as they spoke over the top of each other. She nudged Rory who surreptitiously watched the show from the corner of her eye as the argument reached another level with both men pushing their chairs back as they stood up hastily. Lorelai waited for them to come to blows as they moved towards each other, and was surprised when they reached out and shook hands and departed with a smile.

Looking back to meet Rory's eyes, Lorelai grinned. "I take it loud, irate sounding dialogue is the norm for Italians then." Her next words came without thought, "You know what? Luke would be right at home here. I wonder if he has any Italian ancestors?"

Her smile faded and her stomach tied in knots when she realized what she'd said. This was only the second day of their trip; she wasn't supposed to be thinking about Luke. As the waiter came by to clear their plates, Rory suggested they head off to find the Colosseum. Lorelai agreed absently, a sick feeling of nerves still present in her stomach. She knew that there was a Big Decision to be made, but she wasn't ready to think about it just yet.

* * *

The sun was beating down mercilessly and Lorelai could feel the rivulets of sweat running down her back. She stopped for a moment to stare up at the steep, seemingly never-ending staircase still in front of her. Taking a gulp of tepid water from the bottle clutched in her hand, she took in a couple of deep breaths and waited for Rory to come to a stop beside her.

"How many to go?" Rory gasped out.

"About seventy," Lorelai returned briefly, moving to sit on a rocky outcrop that lined the path. When her breath had returned somewhat, she looked down at the two hundred or so steps they had already climbed before gazing out in the glittering blue sea that surrounded Santorini. "Remind me again why we didn't just take a donkey ride to the top?"

"Because you insisted that your donkey was glaring at you and telepathically telling you that if you climbed on he'd make sure you never made it to the top alive," Rory returned breathlessly as she dumped her backpack and took a seat beside Lorelai.

"Oh yeah," Lorelai grimaced sheepishly. "I need to remind myself that I'm not Dr Doolittle."

What a way to finish their time here in the Greek Islands. They had done their fair share of lazing around in the last few days and taking this tour on their final day had seemed like a good idea at the time. From where she sat now, she could see in the distance the black outline of the volcanic island that they had sailed to earlier today. Somewhat disappointingly the bubbling crater of molten lava she had been anticipating as she slogged to the top was not there. All they encountered was an awful lot of black rock, a sulfurous rotten egg smell and slightly warm soil underfoot. Still, the view from the top of the volcano had been amazing, with views back to the island of Santorini and its villages of traditional white buildings that glistened in the afternoon sun.

Their tour had finished in the harbor below the village of Oia, which was perched on the top of the cliff far above them. If they made it to the top, their guide promised them that Oia was a picturesque village that had spectacular views of the approaching sunset. The catch was that the only way to get there was to make your way up some 300 steps. What was more, she, queen of the sloths, had apparently taken leave of her senses and decided to walk up those 300 steps. The fact that she had chosen to do this rather than taking the far easier option of the donkey ride must have been the result of sunstroke, she decided absently. It had better be some sunset, she thought as she sat there contemplating the final seventy steps she had yet to climb.

After sitting a few moments longer, Lorelai struggled to her feet again and continued the slow ascent. If Luke could see her now, he would laugh himself senseless, she thought wryly. She smiled to herself fondly at the thought of Luke being here in Greece to witness her feeble performance on the mother of all staircases.Even in the soaring heat they were currently experiencing, Luke would probably still insist on wearing his flannel armor and he would have made it to the top at least half an hour ago.

She was, by now, used to these thoughts that had begun to intrude with an ever increasing frequency. In the end, the 'Big Decision' as she so melodramatically had thought of it only a few weeks ago was really no decision at all. However much it scared her, there was only one option with Luke. Now that they'd started down that path they could never go back and what was more, she didn't want to. Those thoughts of Luke had disturbed her at first. But then, with each time that she thought of him, the feelings of panic faded a little and were instead replaced by the realization of how great a relationship with Luke could be. She was having the time of her life here with Rory, but part of her longed to get on the next plane to the States and walk into the diner and not leave until she knew where things stood with Luke. She knew that the road ahead would not be easy, but regardless of those fears she needed to give it a try. She missed him more than she would have thought possible and she wanted him and as soon as she got back to Stars Hollow, she was going to tell him that. Now she just needed to find out how Rory felt about the prospect.

They eventually made it up the stairs and spent the remaining time until sunset wandering around the numerous souvenir shops that lined the cobblestone streets. Then they sat down on some rocks that afforded a good view of the approaching sunset. Lorelai stared out at the slowly setting sun which was, at the moment, partially obscured by a number of fluffy clouds that were hovering on the horizon. Then she gathered up her courage to ask Rory how she would feel about Operation: Date Luke.

"Hey kid," Lorelai began cautiously.

Rory was eating her way through a rapidly melting ice-cream and responded with a distracted, "Yeah?"

Oh hell, she might as well just get it out there. "How would you feel if I dated Luke?"

Rory froze mid-swallow and turned quickly to face Lorelai with a stunned expression of her face. "What?"

"Umm, me, you know, dating Luke. How would you feel about it?"

Lorelai watched Rory lower her head to rapidly eat the last few mouthfuls of ice-cream before she wiped her hands on some napkins. Finally Rory asked carefully, "You mean our Luke, Stars Hollow Luke, proprietor of Luke's Diner, I take it?"

Lorelai was, for once, unable to decipher the expression on Rory's face. Taking refuge in levity, she quipped, "Well there was a shortlist of three Lukes: Luke Skywalker, Luke from the Dukes of Hazzard and Luke Danes. Since the other two are fictional, Luke Danes it was." But then she added more soberly, "In other words, yes, how would you feel if I dated Stars Hollow Luke?"

There was a long moment of silence and then Rory smirked and replied, "Fine."

"Fine?" Lorelai asked in astonishment. She narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "Fine as in, yes, Mother, that is completely fine by me even though this is the first I have ever heard of it and this is a big shock to me?"

Rory grinned as she responded, "Well yes, and no. I think it's good but it's not a shock. Something happened before we left, didn't it?"

Lorelai felt a flush spread across her face and stammered, "What…what makes you say that?"

Rory shrugged. "My childhood days of reading Nancy Drew and Harriet the Spy are finally paying off. You went out for supplies and to ask Luke about my book the night before we left and then came back with neither book nor food. When I asked you about Anna Karenina you made some flip remark that a Russian tragedy was too depressing to take on our European odyssey. You've mentioned Luke at least a couple of times a day every day that we've been away." She smiled slyly as she added, "You said his name in your sleep last night."

"Well that's all kinds of embarrassing," Lorelai muttered as she felt her face turn even redder. She turned to watch the sunset again and digested Rory's words. The sun was nearing the horizon now and the clouds that hovered there were turning a stunning array of pinks and oranges. "Have I been that obvious?" she finally asked.

"Kind of," Rory shrugged. "Well, it was pretty easy to see where things were headed, anyway." They watched the sunset for a few moments before Rory question, "So, I take it that Luke's not seeing Nicole anymore?"

Lorelai froze as a strong wave of dislike ran through her at the mention of Nicole. Wow, exactly how long had she felt that? If she was being completely honest with herself, she probably felt that about three seconds after she met Nicole for the first time. Well, it didn't matter now because she didn't need to worry about Nicole anymore. What had happened that night before they left for Europe had changed things. Luke couldn't possibly have kissed her like that only to turn around and leave with Nicole. Whatever there had been with Nicole, it was over now.

She finally replied, "I'm pretty sure that Nicole is no longer in the picture."

They watched the sunset in silence for a few minutes longer before Lorelai spoke again. "And you're really, honestly, okay with this?" She turned to look back at Rory focusing steadily on her face.

Rory nodded and smiled reassuringly. "Yeah, I am." She hesitated for a moment and then added, "That is, if you're serious about this. Because if you're with Luke, it means you're really _with Luke_ and all of Stars Hollow will be watching."

Lorelai considered Rory's words for a moment as she watched the sun begin to dip below the horizon; the color in the sky even more brilliant now. "Yeah, I know that and I really am serious about this. Of course I could do without the possibility that Luke and I will become the number one tourist attraction in town. But at this point Taylor could start selling tickets and I wouldn't change my mind. I just really want to give it a try."

They sat in silence again for some minutes before Rory spoke once more. "I know the last year hasn't really been that great for you, Mom…after Dad and everything. I just want you to be happy and I think could you be happy with Luke."

Lorelai watched the pinks and orange tinged clouds darken as night descended and she waited for the ache that she always felt when she thought about Christopher to wash over her now. It never came. She drew in a deep breath and realized suddenly that it no longer hurt. She was free. She had been hurt, very hurt, a year ago but that pain had eased some time ago. Whatever hopes she had for Chris were extinguished months ago. Chris would always be…Chris. Charming, full of easy banter, but weak and unreliable. She'd held onto the dreams of a sixteen year old girl for far too long. But the prince she had dreamed of back then had feet of clay and now, it looked like she had finally grown up. She no longer wanted that unreliable prince who promised so many things but never delivered on them. She wanted a grumpy, flannel attired, baseball cap wearing man who fed her and supported her and was there for her even when she was too blind to see how much he meant to her. She told Rory a long time ago that these things happened for a reason, and maybe that was true, even in the case of Christopher.

Reaching an arm out and slinging it over Rory's shoulder, she gave her a brief hug. "I think you're right. I could be very happy with Luke."

* * *

The sun shone brightly in the Jardin du Luxembourg and Parisians were taking full advantage of the first good weather in days. Couples reclined in chairs, basking in the afternoon sun's warm rays. The stone façade of the Luxembourg Palace rose majestically in front of a wide expansive pond and the building cast an austere eye over the park's patrons. Children were enthusiastically engaged in sailing motorized model boats across the still waters of the pond and families were bonding over ice-creams. Lorelai walked through the crowd, smiling briefly at the antics of one child who was doing her level best to fall into the fountain in her eagerness to reach her boat, while her mother did _her _level best to prevent it from happening.

Their first encounter with the city of romance three days ago had been somewhat disappointing given the sheets of rain they had run through to get from the metro to their hostel. But they had found plenty of ways to fill in their time and today had finally dawned brightly. They'd taken full advantage of the sun this morning to see the Eiffel Tower with a group of Irish college students who they befriended in the hostel several days earlier. Although the students had taken Rory off for the afternoon to explore further, Lorelai had elected to come here to the park instead. This was the day that she had arranged, weeks ago, to phone Sookie to make sure that arrangements for the sale of the Inn were going to plan.

Lorelai wandered away from the main crowd of people concentrated near the imposing palace. She meandered down the immaculately kept tree-lined paths until she found an empty park bench situated under a shady tree in a less populated region of the park. She pulled out her cell phone and began to scroll through the phonebook to find Sookie's number, pausing for a moment when she came to the number for the diner. Maybe she should phone Luke too, she thought, with an equal mix of eagerness and uncertainty. But then, what exactly was she going to say to him? 'Hey, Luke. I'm half a world away in Paris, the city of lovers, how about you come and join me?' Or maybe, 'Hi Luke, remember what we were doing the day before I left? How about we plan to do a lot more of that when I get back?' No, some conversations were better left until they were face to face, she thought with nervous anticipation.

Finally, she came to Sookie's number and rapidly dialed it. The phone only rang a couple of times before the other end picked up and Sookie uttered a quick, "Hello?"

Lorelai smiled at the familiar sound of Sookie's voice and replied, "Hey, Sookie."

There was a pause and then Sookie spoke eagerly, "Oh my god, Lorelai. I completely forgot you were phoning today. I'll be back in a sec, I've got a cake in the oven and if it's in there another minute it's going to be ruined."

There was the brief sound of dishes crashing and a moment of silence and then Sookie breathlessly came back on the line. "Crisis averted. So, tell me everything. Where are you now? Are you having fun? Did you meet a gorgeous Italian count who wants sweep you away to his Tuscan villa?"

Lorelai grinned at the onslaught of questions. "Let's see…we're in Paris, having the time of our lives, no gorgeous Italians, though I did get a marriage proposal from one seventy year old Greek gentleman. I make it a rule to only accept proposals from men with their original set of teeth so sadly the answer was no."

"So you're having a good time then?" Sookie confirmed.

"Oh yeah, Sook, the best. How are you and Jackson, and the baby?"

"We're all fine, though I'm currently having a little bit of a difference of opinion with Jackson about the quality of his radishes. Oh yeah, and the Inn. Everything's great. Nothing to worry about, all that legal stuff is going smoothly. Oh Lorelai, I can't wait for you to get back, I've found the perfect oven for the Dragonfly."

"That's great Sookie. I want to hear all the Stars Hollow gossip. Is Michel still as obnoxious as ever? Has Kirk got any new jobs? How's construction on Taylor's Soda Shoppe going? Has it driven Luke insane yet?"

"Everything's pretty much the same here. Michel is indeed obnoxious, Kirk tried to start a new dog walking service but managed to lose three of the dogs on his first day. I was in town today, and saw the Soda Shoppe. It's almost ready. Taylor put in a glass window so you can see from his shop into the diner. I think Luke's going to be seriously annoyed when he gets back."

Lorelai had been letting the familiar sounds of Sookie's chatter flow over her, but froze when she heard those last words. She pressed the phone closer to her ear, certain that she had heard incorrectly. "Sookie, wait, what do you mean when Luke gets back?"

"Well, he's still away on his cruise, isn't he?"

"Cruise?" Lorelai questioned a little unsteadily.

"You did say it was a cruise, didn't you? Anyway Luke's not here and the diner's been closed for the last couple of weeks."

Lorelai sat in silence, a strange numbness settling over her. She was vaguely aware of Sookie still speaking to her, but couldn't find the words to answer her for a moment. Then clarity returned and she heard Sookie worriedly enquiring, "Lorelai, are you there?"

"Yeah, Sookie. Sorry, I just got distracted for a moment," she said shakily. She lapsed into silence and let Sookie ramble on for a while longer before breaking in. "Listen Sookie, I'd better go now. If this call is much longer, I'll probably have to offer to sell my first born, in other words Rory, in order to pay for it. I'll see you in a few weeks okay?"

After saying their goodbyes, Lorelai hung up the phone and sat there motionless for a moment. It couldn't be true, she thought wildly. Sookie had made a mistake or she'd misheard. Luke couldn't have gone on the cruise after what had happened between them. She scrolled through the numbers of her phone again and dialed the diner, her hand shaking a little as she lifted the phone to her ear. But although she let it ring for some time, no one answered. She ended the call, searching this time for the number to Luke's apartment. When she dialed, she could hear the phone at the other end ring several times and her heart leapt when she heard Luke's voice. But her hopes were dashed when she heard him telling her to leave a message. She abruptly hung up and sat clutching the phone in her lap, numb acceptance settling over her. He'd gone on the cruise. He'd made his choice and it hadn't been her.

She sat motionless for a moment, staring sightlessly in front of her, oblivious to the world around her. Lorelai clutched the phone closer to her, fighting against the sudden need to yell and scream and burst into tears. She sniffed defiantly though, rubbing a hand roughly across her face. She was not going to cry, damn it. She couldn't cry over someone she'd never even had in the first place. She opened her bag now and viciously shoved the phone into it.

Stupid Luke, she thought irrationally as she tried to convince herself that it never would have worked. She'd been fooling herself, panicking that Rory was leaving for college and that she would be alone. So she'd latched onto the first opportunity that had been offered to her and tricked herself into thinking she had feelings for Luke that didn't exist. Besides, she would be busy for the next year trying to open the Inn. Even if she did have feelings, there were too many other things going on for a relationship with Luke to have lasted. They never would have worked. She would have thrown away their friendship for something that had never had a chance. There was absolutely nothing to be sorry about.

Drawing in a deep breath, Lorelai gathered up her bag and tried to stand up. But she stood for only a moment, before she realized she was shaking too much to stay upright and her legs couldn't support her. Sinking down onto the bench once more, she leant forward and buried her face in her hands, surrendering to the all too real feelings of hurt and regret. Denial was no longer going to cut it, she realized bitterly. She and Luke could have worked and it could have been great. No, not could, _would_. They would have been great and she had finally realized how much she wanted it. The fact that now Luke was going to make it work and have a great life with someone else hurt more than she ever would have thought possible.

She lifted her face from her hands. Why had he kissed her then? To satisfy curiosity? Apparently not because he harbored any feelings for her. For all the people telling her that Luke was crazy about her, she'd certainly never heard it from him. In fact, until the day of Rory's graduation he hadn't made one single move to indicate that he felt more than friendship. Maybe everyone had seen something that had never been there. How could she have been so arrogant as to blithely assume that Luke would just be there waiting anxiously for her to reach a decision? Like she was the only one who had to decide. For him, it seemed there was never a choice to be made and in the end she had never even been in the running.

She couldn't have said how long she sat there on the park bench that afternoon, wrapped up in her feelings of unhappiness and hurt. But eventually, she drew in a deep breath and stood up to head back to the hostel to meet Rory. She had three weeks left on this trip with Rory and then a month with her before she left for Yale. She was going to enjoy those times and she would be happy for Luke and Nicole. She still had Rory and she had her Inn and she would make the best of things, just like she always did. She would move on, and eventually it would hurt less. Eventually.

_To be continued_


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer.** Still not mine.

**A/N.** Thanks again to NicoleMack for beta-ing this chapter.

**Part Three: That is…**

There were some people who had a seemingly endless capacity for tolerance and patience. Such people could wait for an eternity and never once complain about it. He was not one of those people, Luke decided irritably as the group of tourists who had just entered the diner hovered indecisively near the door before finally deciding on a table. His patience, never one of his strengths at the best of times, was now essentially non-existent.

Saturday had always been a busy day at the diner, and such a day was therefore never likely to inspire an abiding love of humanity in him. But when you factored in the wearying see-saw of anticipation and disappointment that he felt each time that bell above the door rang, it was perhaps unsurprising that he had reached the end of his ever shortening tether. Each time the bell diner rang today, he looked up hopefully and each time he was irrationally disappointed that the person there was not Lorelai. It didn't matter how many times he reminded himself that she had only returned the night before and was therefore likely to be sleeping off the after effects of jetlag, bad airplane food and six weeks of travel. All the rationalizations in the world didn't make a single iota of difference.

Lorelai was home and that meant he would finally find out where he stood with her and if he had even the slightest of chances that she was interested in him. He'd been regretting for six weeks that he hadn't talked to Lorelai on the day that she left. If he had to wait much longer, there was a very real possibility that he was going to go insane. The memory of the night that he fought with her, kissed her and watched her run was never far from his mind. Those short moments of elation that he felt when he realized he could finally be getting what he wanted for so long had been all too quickly swept away by the overwhelming guilt he felt about what he had done to Nicole. He never, in his life, had been unfaithful to a woman before, but when Lorelai looked at him like that, the world outside of the two of them had just ceased to exist. In the aftermath, what was completely and utterly clear was that no matter what did or did not happen in the future with Lorelai, he could no longer be with Nicole.

Even if those few moments in his apartment with Lorelai was his only chance to have her in his arms, he just couldn't pretend that those feelings did not exist. It wasn't fair to himself, but most of all it wasn't fair to Nicole. So he met her the day that Lorelai left for Europe and ended things. It was neither easy nor pleasant, but it had been necessary. Since then, he'd been stuck in a maddening holding pattern, with no idea of where he stood with Lorelai. Not knowing if he had any kind of chance with her and unsure of what, if anything, she felt for him. He'd been berating himself for six weeks and it was abundantly clear to him now that he should have insisted they talk before she left.

Luke looked up as the bell to the diner rang once more, and inevitably it was not Lorelai. Even more disappointingly, it was Kirk who entered and crossed to sit at the counter. Knowing that his chances of getting through even a two second conversation with Kirk without raising his voice were essentially zero, Luke left Caesar to deal with him and crossed to start clearing the plates away from a corner table. As he did so, he found he was staring directly into the new window that Taylor had installed between the diner and the Soda Shoppe. Barely restraining himself from tossing something at the window, Luke shook his head and began to wipe down the table instead.

There was definitely a lesson to be learnt there. Under no circumstances allow Taylorfree reinover building renovations while not around to prevent travesties like that damn window. He never should have gone to the cabin. In those first few days that Lorelai was gone, he found himself so irritated and on edge that he started to burn the food and yell at people for no good reason. At the time, it seemed like a wise course of action to close the diner for a couple of weeks. It would have been closed anyway if he'd gone on the cruise and he'd already given Caesar the time off. What was more, he didn't particularly relish serving the summer crowds alone. Of course taking the time off hadn't been a particularly brilliant course of action either. While spending time at the cabin meant he could go fishing and hiking, it also meant he was alone and therefore had ample time to think. Only he hadn't felt like thinking at all by that point.

He knew that if he started thinking, then he would start imagining that there was some kind of chance that Lorelai would reciprocate those long denied feelings he could deny no more. Things never worked out well when he got his hopes up. He always told himself to never plan more than two days in advance and it wouldn't do to go changing that now. Still his mind would wander and he would find himself thinking about things he hadn't considered, since…Rachel. He wasn't given to flights of fancy, yet somehow in the isolation of the cabin, tempting thoughts of a future with Lorelai would come to him. But then he would remember how she looked at him before she ran away and negativity returned. Now, six weeks later, he just had to know one way or the other. This torture was killing him and he just wanted to be put out of his misery for once and for all.

* * *

As the afternoon slowly became evening and the dinner rush petered out, Luke finally gave up hope of seeing Lorelai in the diner that day. The Stars Hollow grapevine was in top form and he'd heard from more than one person about their varied sightings of Lorelai throughout the day. Once, when he glanced out the window for a moment, he thought he caught a glimpse of her moving briskly across the town square. But she disappeared from sight before he could confirm it was her. He knew from Babette that Rory was spending a few days with her father in Boston before finally returning to Stars Hollow, and so Lorelai had returned alone. Miss Patty had seen her in Doose's and Gypsy had talked to her in the video shop. He was starting to wonder if perhaps Lorelai was going to just avoid him completely. He'd more than half expected that, but that didn't prevent the disappointment he now felt.

Luke let out a sigh and glowered at his only remaining customer, Kirk. He, apparently, had had a fight with his mother and was trying to gather up the courage to return home. Just as Luke was resigning himself to the lengthy battle he would face to get rid of Kirk, he noticed the expression on his face change abruptly. Casting a quick glance outside, Luke could see a stern faced Mrs Gleason beckoning to Kirk. For a moment, Luke thought he might actually have the courage to resist, but instead he dug some money out of his pocket, placed it on the table and stood up to leave. With an inward sigh of relief Luke gathered some coffee cups from the counter and carried them into the kitchen. As he did so, he heard Kirk open the door and utter a greeting to someone. Luke froze when he heard that person reply. It was Lorelai.

Dumping the cups in the sink, Luke hurriedly made his way back out and came to a halt when he saw her. She was standing by the door and she held a small white cardboard box in her hands. He drank in the sight of her hungrily, thinking she looked even more beautiful than he had remembered. She was wearing a red tank top and jeans and her hair flowed loosely over her shoulders. Those piercing blue eyes were fixed intently on him now and he stared back at her without speaking until what seemed to be a slightly restrained smile crossed Lorelai's face.

"Hey, Luke," she said, her grip on the box she held seeming to tighten a little.

"Hi," he returned awkwardly, shoving his hands in his back pockets. He stared at her for a moment longer and then asked gruffly, "Coffee?" He turned to walk behind the counter, grabbing the pot and a cup as he did so.

"Sure, okay," came Lorelai's reply and she slid onto a stool, placing the box on the counter in front of her.

Luke pushed the coffee cup over to her and watched in silence as she took a long sip. Then Lorelai began to speak, babbling nervously as she held her cup. "After much in-depth research across at least seven different countries, I can safely say that your title as the king of coffee is unchallenged, Luke. Well in my opinion anyway, your position with Rory is more precarious. She was definitely entranced by the coffee at this one place in Florence. Her opinion may have been somewhat influenced by the fact that a gorgeous Italian waiter served it to her though. But fear not, I think it was merely a brief flirtation and if you give her some of the special stuff with the nutmeg she could be tempted back." Lorelai's nervous words trailed off as she looked up at Luke for a moment, before she focused again on her coffee.

"Uh yeah, I'll make that my number one priority," Luke replied absently. He was only half paying attention to her words as he fought the urge to reach across the counter and haul Lorelai into his arms and kiss her senseless. He stared at her for a moment, longing to ask her straight away about her feelings concerning that night before she left. Instead he settled for asking about her trip. "So, did you and Rory have a good time?"

Lorelai nodded enthusiastically, seeming to relax a little now. "Oh yeah, it was the best. We made it through seven different countries without creating a single diplomatic incident, I'm sure you'll be relieved to know. I did come close once though. You'll never believe it, I got to touch the Pope. Well, the Pope mobile at least. I can tell you that those Vatican guards have absolutely no sense of humor at all."

Lorelai broke off for a moment to take a sip of coffee, but then began to chatter away again. "Oh, and the shopping was fabulous. By the end of the fourth week, Rory had actually banned me from buying anything more unless I could come up with a way to clone myself to carry it all. Alas, my mad scientist genes are severely lacking. Mind you, she wasn't blameless either. Every time we came across an English language bookshop, she wouldn't leave until she'd practically bought up their entire stock. Now I bought my fair share of shoes and clothes and souvenirs, but nothing quite matches the sheer bulky awkwardness of a big pile of books."

At the mention of Rory's propensity for reading, Luke seized his opportunity. He took advantage of Lorelai's momentary silence to reach below the counter and pick up Rory's copy of Anna Karenina. He pushed it across the counter and whatever Lorelai had been planning to say next never came as her gaze locked onto the book.

"Speaking of books…you left this here," Luke said softly, his eyes trained eagerly on her face. Lorelai looked up at him fleetingly and he watched as she reached out and silently pulled it towards her.

"Thanks," she muttered, all the animation that had been in her face moments before fading as she focused on the book.

It was now or never, Luke decided suddenly. Leaning on the counter, he said her name quietly.

She looked up, trepidation plainly written on her face as she met his eyes for barely a moment.

"We need to talk," he said. Lorelai was shaking her head in denial almost before he could get the words out.

"No, Luke. We really don't." Lorelai's grip on her cup tightened and she avoided eye contact again, as if she suddenly found the contents of her cup incredibly fascinating.

Luke felt a stab of panic at her words. He heard a note of desperation enter his voice as he made another effort to speak. "But we…"

Lorelai broke in before he could complete the thought. "No. There's nothing to talk about. It was a mistake and let's just forget it ever happened."

Luke felt his stomach drop and an embarrassed flush rose on his face as he focused his gaze on the counter in front of him. Well, that made things pretty clear then. All of his hopes and worrying about this had been for nothing and he was right back where he started. Picking up a cloth and playing with it restlessly, he looked up at Lorelai again and queried solemnly, "Mistake, huh?"

"Yeah," she replied and he watched as she slid off her seat and quickly said, "Look I guess I'm still jetlagged, so I'm going to go." She picked up Rory's book and stood there hesitantly for a moment. Finally, she pushed the box she had been holding earlier across the counter in his direction. "We got this for you when we were in Ireland."

Luke watched in silence as Lorelai made her way to the door. She opened it slowly and looked back at him for a moment. "See you later?" she queried.

He nodded silently, his hands clenching into fists on the counter as he watched the door close behind her. Barely aware of what he was doing, Luke reached forward and picked up Lorelai's cup and took it through to the kitchen. He walked back out and carefully wiped down the tables, placing the chairs on each as he finished cleaning. Then he meticulously began to wipe down the counter top, neatly stacking the menus, and lining up the condiments on the counter top as a smug voice in his head told him that he should have expected this would be the way things ended.

The last six weeks of waiting had been for nothing. She didn't want anything from him and never would. Sitting down heavily on the chair that Lorelai had recently vacated, Luke dragged the box she had left behind towards him and stared sightlessly at the plain white exterior. Yeah, it was a mistake all right, he thought bitterly. It was a mistake to hope that Lorelai would ever see him as anything more than a friend or more than the person who served her coffee and burgers. It was a mistake to foolishly get his hopes up for something that obviously wasn't ever going to happen. It was a mistake to have let it happen in the first place, to hurt Nicole and destroy whatever hope he had for more out of life than running this diner. With a sigh of resignation, Luke leaned forward and opened the lid off the box. He lifted off some tissue paper and tossed it onto the counter before looking inside.

"What the hell?" he muttered as he looked down at the box. He reached into it, and picked up the contents, staring at it for a moment. It was a crystal bell. He frowned in confusion and set it down carefully on the counter, hearing a gentle ringing as he did so. Why on earth had Lorelai bought him a bell and a glass one at that? What exactly about him suggested that this was an appropriate gift for him? What the hell was she thinking? He looked into the box again, hoping to find a written explanation, but there was nothing.

For a moment longer, Luke sat there completely perplexed by her gift, but then anger suddenly rose to the forefront. What the hell was Lorelai trying to do to him? She didn't want to talk about the thing he'd just spent the last six weeks thinking about constantly? A quick 'It was a mistake' speech was all that he was worthy of? And now she had given him some mysterious present without even the courtesy of an explanation. She really _was _trying to drive him round the bend.

He'd been waiting for six weeks for her to return and he couldn't take this anymore. Everyone had their limit and in all truth he reached his long ago. He had been too much of a coward to say anything to Lorelai for seven years but now he wasn't going to give up without a fight. Luke picked up the bell and placed it back in its box and then crossed the distance to the door in three quick steps, holding the box firmly in one hand. He locked the door to the diner and strode off down the street towards Lorelai's house. It had taken him seven years and the last six weeks to get to this point. This time, he wasn't going to let Lorelai get away until she explained to him, in-depth, with flow diagrams if necessary, exactly why this wasn't going to work.

* * *

Some minutes later, Luke walked across Lorelai's front lawn and stomped up the stairs to the door. Knocking on the door, he waited impatiently for Lorelai to answer. When the door failed to open within ten seconds he knocked again loudly. Eventually there was movement on the other side and he could hear Lorelai yelling irritably, "Yeah, yeah, keep your shirt on."

When she swung the door open, her mouth dropped open when she saw who stood there. Some small part of him noticed that Lorelai's eyes seemed a little red and she looked worn and tired, but the greater part of him was too angry to notice anything at all. Luke strode into the house past Lorelai into the living room, waiting for her to shut the door and follow him.

When she entered the room, he didn't let her get a word in however, but held out the box to her and demanded, "Okay, what the hell is this?"

Lorelai blinked at the ferocity of his words for a moment but then replied relatively mildly, "I told you, Rory and I got it for you in Ireland."

"Yeah, I heard that part," Luke said impatiently. "But what I didn't hear was the part about why you thought a glass bell screamed Lucas Danes. I know I'm not a Harvard graduate or anything, but I don't think the connection is immediately obvious."

"It's all there in the card Luke, or am I about to have a Lifetime movie moment and find out that the surly, rude man is that way because he's ashamed he cannot read?" A defensive note entered Lorelai's voice now and she started to glare at him.

"Card?" Luke asked, pulling off the lid of the box and lifting out the bell to set it on the coffee table before turning back to Lorelai. Showing her the box he growled, "I don't see a card, do you?"

The frown on Lorelai's face had deepened as he spoke, but it seemed to falter for a moment when she saw that there was, in fact, no card. "Oh," was all that she said in reply however.

"You're driving me crazy. You know that, don't you?" Luke spoke again now, his voice hard and strident as he started to pace up and down in the living room. "I don't get it. You'll date Christopher and Max and Chris again and that fishing guy and boys who are just barely old enough to have graduated from college, but you won't even give me a second glance. But then you flip out completely when you find I'm thinking about proposing to Nicole and you kiss me. I may have started things that night Lorelai, but you were right there too and you didn't seem to have any complaints. Then you run off and you leave for six weeks, and when you come back you're telling me that it was a mistake and giving me glass bells. I just can't understand it."

"What don't you understand, Luke?" Lorelai burst out angrily as he finished his rant. "It seems pretty damn clear to me. Of course it was a mistake. You are the one who already made the choice, not me."

"Choice?" Luke swung around to face her, confusion wiping away most of his anger. "What choice?"

"What choice do you think? The one where you decided to go on the cruise with Nicole." She threw the words at him quickly and broke off as she mentioned Nicole's name. As the implication of her words struck him, Luke saw Lorelai wipe at her cheek for a moment before she continued, hurt now clearly evident in her voice. "I'm trying to do the right thing here Luke, and you're throwing it in my face."

As she trailed off, she turned her back to him, wrapping her arms around her waist and stunned realization washed over Luke. "You think I went on the cruise with Nicole?" he stammered out. Lorelai nodded, not once looking at him as she moved a few steps further away from him. For a moment Luke was too stunned to move as he tried in vain to work out how she had arrived at such a conclusion. But then he drew in a deep breath as hope returned once more in full force. There was a possibility that there could be a light at the end of a very long tunnel. "I didn't go on the cruise."

Lorelai froze for a moment and then turned around to stare at him. "What?" she asked, confusion now evident in her face.

"I didn't go on the cruise. I ended things with Nicole the day you went to Europe."

_To be continued_


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer. **Still not mine.

**A/N.** Thank you to NicoleMack for her enthusiasm for this story and for her excellent beta-ing throughout. My thanks also to everyone who has reviewed this story. It has been great to read your comments.

_Previously: _

"_I didn't go on the cruise. I ended things with Nicole the day you went to Europe." _

**Part Four**

The full implication of Luke's words washed over Lorelai and she found herself almost unable to breathe as she told herself she couldn't possibly have heard what she thought she'd heard. She repeated Luke's words back to him. "You ended things with Nicole."

Luke nodded, his gaze fixed on her face and she said in confusion, "But Sookie said you'd gone. The diner was closed for weeks, and you weren't here."

"I'd already given Caesar the time off so I closed the diner and went to the cabin. I spent the time fishing and hiking."

"Alone," she confirmed eagerly.

"Yes," was his immediate reply. Lorelai met Luke's eyes briefly, noticing the open and hopeful expression on his face and she suddenly felt weak with relief.

"Okay, I think I need to sit down now," she said unsteadily and moved the few steps to the sofa, sinking down onto the soft cushions. After a moment of hesitation, Luke crossed to sit beside her, and they both remained silent, letting the weight of their conversation settle over them.

He wasn't with Nicole and maybe she hadn't lost her chance after all. Lorelai drew in a deep breath, her mind starting to play catch up with her heart, which had already decided it was party time, the weeks of unhappiness swept away in an instant. She felt overwhelmed by the revelation and so she focused on the least important detail of their argument. Her gaze fell on the bell still sitting on the table and she reached forward to pick it up.

"So I guess I was wasting my money when I bought you an engagement present then," Lorelai said when she could finally find the words.

Luke looked at the bell then, sitting in silence for a moment before he followed her lead and replied, "Engagement present huh? I still don't get why it's a bell."

She drew in a deep breath, feeling the heat of his gaze on her. She kept looking at the bell however, unable to meet his eyes now. "Okay, this is going to sound really stupid. In fact, it's so cheesy I can't believe I got conned into it. But I swear there was this 120 year old Irish woman who was so tiny she probably had leprechaun genes and let me tell you she was very persuasive. I knew that Nicole's last name was Irish, so I asked this lady about Irish wedding gifts. Apparently it's a tradition to give a bell, it's supposed to be good luck. Oh and if two lovers fight, then you're supposed to ring the bell and it breaks the spirit of discontent." She rang the bell gently as she spoke the last words before setting it down on the table. She could still feel Luke watching her, but he didn't respond to her rambling story.

When she cast a quick glance in his direction, she felt her heart start to beat faster when she realized he was staring at her as though she were not only a Porterhouse steak, but a whole five course banquet. The look in his eyes made her stomach flutter with nervous excitement but the implications of that look were suddenly too much to deal with. She stood up to put some distance between them again.

"I need a beer. Do you want a beer?" she asked quickly, exiting to the kitchen before Luke could respond.

When she opened the refrigerator, she stared into it for a perplexed moment, unable to remember why she had come out here. She drew in a deep steadying breath and remembered the beer. After grabbing two bottles, she shut the door and then hovered indecisively. The feeling of nervous excitement seemed to have rendered her incapable of movement.

Suddenly she heard a sound behind her and turned to see that Luke had followed her into the kitchen. He was still staring at her with that silent, hungry gaze. Setting the beers on the table, Lorelai finally asked what she'd been longing to ask for the last five minutes. "Luke, why did you and Nicole break up?"

The intent expression on Luke's face was replaced by one of caution and discomfort. He reached forward for a beer, and picked it up, but then quickly replaced it on the table again. He shoved his hands in his pockets and stared down at the table. "I think it's pretty obvious."

"I need you to tell me Luke," she said softly, barely letting herself believe that everything could be working out now, after the heartache of the last three weeks.

He looked up at her then and it seemed like an eternity before he finally spoke again. "Because of you. And what happened that night." He met her gaze fully now. "Because I had feelings for you."

"Had?" Lorelai asked reflexively.

"Have," Luke replied immediately, the sincerity evident in his voice.

She stared at him for one final moment and then both mind and heart were in agreement that this was indeed party time. She crossed the few feet between them rapidly and wrapped her arms around Luke tightly, burying her face in the crook of his neck as she clutched at the soft material of his flannel. She felt him wrap his arms around her without hesitation, his large hands spread flat across her back as she was pulled ever closer into his embrace. She took in a deep breath, imprinting the moment in her mind: the strength of his arms around her, the rapid beating of his heart, the way his hand tangled in her hair as he tightened his embrace. The wave of joy that was spreading through her was overwhelming in its intensity and although the strength of the emotion scared her, for once in her life it didn't make her want to run. After savoring the moment a little longer, Lorelai lifted her head from Luke's shoulder and spoke throatily into his ear. "In case you were wondering Luke, those feelings are entirely reciprocated."

Luke tightened his embrace for a long moment and almost lifted her off her feet as he hugged her. But then he loosened his arms slightly, and she pulled back to look into his eyes as he grinned widely at her. For a moment they both stood there smiling foolishly at each other, and then slowly Lorelai slid a hand up Luke's chest to grasp his flannel and pulled him towards her. When they kissed, the feeling was at once achingly familiar and yet far better than she remembered. The frantic desperation of six weeks ago was eclipsed by a slow, heated exchange that seemed filled with promise for the future. When they finally parted, Luke settled his hands gently at her waist and she smiled up at his dazed expression, feeling the laughter and joy bubbling within her. Suddenly life seemed filled with possibility.

"So I guess this means we're going steady," she said brightly, feeling her smile widen even further when she saw a slightly irate expression cross his face. "And that makes me your girlfriend?" she continued. "Your significant other? Your main squeeze? Your bit of stuff? Your…"

Her next words were cut off when Luke planted his lips on hers and kissed her decisively. She smiled into the kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck, responding enthusiastically. When Luke broke away breathing heavily, he ran his hands down to settle at the small of her back and said smugly, "Glad to see that works."

"What works?" she asked absently, distracted by the feel of his hands caressing her back.

"I've finally found a way to shut you up," Luke replied, smiling when she frowned at him in mock annoyance. Then some of his previous uncertainty seemed to return. "Just to be certain, you _are _saying you want us to date…" Luke paused, stumbling over his wording, before adding "…be together?"

"Yes," Lorelai replied immediately, hoping that Luke could hear how certain she was about wanting this. If the events of the last six weeks had shown her anything, it was that even if it was a risk to be taking this next step with Luke, she never again wanted to confront the grim reality of never having had that chance with him at all.

A slow smile crossed Luke's face once more and then he suddenly looked down, as if embarrassed by his expression, gruffly saying, "Good. That's good. Me too."

Then looking once more at her with that same intent expression, he leaned forward to plant a lingering kiss on her lips. Who would have thought that they would be so great at this already, Lorelai thought giddily as the kiss continued and she reached up to knock Luke's baseball cap to the floor. Obviously Luke was a man of many hidden talents and she was looking forward to cataloging those talents in some detail. She threaded her hands through his hair, opening her mouth to deepen the kiss. In response, she could feel his hands drift down to her hips and pull her tight against him.

As the kiss escalated rapidly, in a matter of moments they were stumbling back until Lorelai came up against the kitchen counter. Lorelai felt Luke's hands at her waist lifting her up until she was sitting on the counter. She parted her legs to allow him to step between them and then locked her legs at his hips in an effort to draw him still closer. His hands found their way under her shirt and began to trace urgently over the bare skin of her back and she shuddered in response and deepened the kiss even further.

When they parted for breath some moments later, Lorelai buried her face in the juncture of Luke's neck, grinning when she heard him groan and his hands clutched convulsively at her back. She began to eagerly taste his neck, trailing quick kisses from his neck to his collarbone. She reached between them and fought to undo the top few buttons of his flannel as rapidly as their close proximity would allow. Once the material fell apart slightly, Lorelai eagerly began to trace the well defined muscles she felt through the thin cotton of his T-shirt. _Someone's been holding out on me_, she thought giddily as she traced her hands across his chest. As her exploration continued, she slid her hand down between them to caress him through his jeans. Luke froze for a moment, his hands stilling on her back, and groaned softly as she sucked at the skin at his collarbone again.

But she only had the chance to continue for a few moments when Luke reached between them, and clasped her hand, pulling it up to his chest. She whimpered in protest but relaxed when he tangled a hand in her hair and pulled her head to his once more, kissing her briefly before he turned his attention to her neck. Apparently it was her turn now. Luke trailed kisses down her neck and she murmured in approval, savoring the friction of the stubble on his face as it brushed against her sensitive skin. She moved her head to the side to allow him easier access as her legs tightened around his hips once more to urge him ever closer. Then she felt his hand trace gently up along her side and brush for an instant against her breast. She gasped out his name, arching into his touch. His hand moved up to play gently with the strap of her tank top for a moment before he pushed it from her shoulder completely.

If Luke continued this, she wasn't going to last much longer, Lorelai distractedly decided as she clutched at his flannel and his mouth began to trace a heated path across the newly exposed skin of her shoulder. She needed to make relocation plans to her bedroom very soon or she'd damn it all and just let him have his way with her here in the kitchen. She almost succumbed as his lips began to trail ever lower, but finally she gathered up enough resolution to pull away and call a halt to his progress. She spoke breathlessly into his ear, "Luke, wait."

He froze in a matter of moments, and before she knew it, the strap of her shirt was back on her shoulder. Luke dropped his hands to rest on the counter either side of her and he rested his forehead on her shoulder as he breathed in heavily.

Then he lifted his head. "Sorry, sorry, you're right," Luke ground out breathlessly as he tried to move away. "We shouldn't rush this."

Lorelai prevented Luke's escape by tightening her grip on his shirt. "Seven years plus the last six weeks is rushing it?" she queried, leaning forward again to plant a trail of kisses down his neck. "I was just going to suggest we move this to a more comfortable location upstairs." She pulled back uncertainly. "Do you want to wait?"

Luke's hands had found their way back to her and were now stroking up and down her arms gently as his eyes drifted closed. "No, not really," he ground out. "But we haven't even been on a… date yet. And there's you and Rory. She's going to college soon and it'll be your last month together."

At the mention of Rory leaving, a little of Lorelai's joy faded. She considered her daughter for a moment and then added, "Rory and I will definitely spend as much time as we possibly can together, and I don't even want to think about the day she leaves." She frowned for a moment, trying to push away those feelings of dread of when that day arrived. But then she looked up and saw the wild, desperate look in Luke's eyes and she smiled again, her joy returning in full force. She leaned forward to speak into his ear, "But she's away all weekend. And even after that she's still going to want to spend time with Lane, and her father and her grandparents. And I want to spend time with... you. We'll have plenty of time to go on a date. But this," she leaned forward to plant a quick kiss on his lips to demonstrate, "I don't want to wait for any longer."

Luke smiled at her words, but she could still see the restraint and caution in his expression. So she locked her arms around Luke's neck and pulled him close to her, kissing him fervently until he responded. When the kiss ended, he pulled away to look into her face once more. He was silent for a long moment and then spoke the words quickly, and a little desperately. "Just don't change your mind about us, okay?"

There were many things she wanted to say in that moment. That she _was_ afraid of taking this step, because however much they both wanted it, there was no guarantee it was going to work out. But that she was more than willing to take that risk because she knew the alternative of never having tried this at all was not one she ever wanted to think about again. That she'd already been blind to this for too many years and she didn't want to wait anymore. She knew they would have those discussions soon, but at the moment, more than anything else she just wanted and needed him. So in the end, she just shook her head and said gently, "Never going to happen."

The expression on his face cleared then and as she slid off the counter, he pulled her into a tight hug. When they parted, Lorelai grinned happily up at Luke again and led him out of the kitchen. By the time they reached the bottom of the stairs, it was obvious he was most definitely coming around to her way of thinking. He pulled her back against him, slipping his arms around her waist and placed a trail of kisses along her neck. Then he propelled her forward and they moved up the stairs rapidly. When they were standing in her room, Luke pulled her close to him once more, his hands slipping under her shirt again to stroke her bare back.

"You're sure?" he asked one last time.

"I'm sure," she replied firmly.

He stumbled slightly over the words as he said uncertainly, "Umm, protection…condom, I have…"

She shook her head her face flushing a little with embarrassment, "I'm all covered."

He smiled at her and then he was pulling her closer and kissing her again, this time with infinite gentleness. When his hands moved under her shirt again, she lifted her arms willingly to let him remove it. They stood closely together, slowly undressing each other. Then they were in each others arms once more, stumbling towards the bed before they fell down onto it.

They took their time in their exploration of each other and each time Lorelai met Luke's gaze, she was overcome by the tenderness she saw there. She responded eagerly to his touch when he traced gentle hands along her body, his lips trailing down her neck. When Luke moved his attention to her breast and took her nipple into his mouth, she arched up under him, her hands clutching at his head to hold him there. He lavished attention on one breast and then the other, as one hand traced lower along her body, caressing her stomach and then lower. Her legs parted and she gasped incoherently when he began to stroke her there. She choked out his name, overcome with desire for him. She couldn't wait anymore. She pulled Luke's head up for another kiss and reached between them to stroke him, reveling in the strangled moan he let out when she touched him.

She broke the kiss to gasp, "Now," into Luke's ear and he pulled back to look at her with desperate blue eyes.

"Yeah?" he muttered and she nodded urgently as he settled between her legs and she guided him to her. Then, excruciatingly slowly, he slid inside her, both of them gasping at the sensation. When they were fully joined, she met his frantic gaze with what she knew to be a frantic one of her own. Then she murmured encouragingly and he began to move inside her, slowly at first, but then picking up pace as she writhed beneath him. Luke caught her mouth in a passionate kiss and Lorelai responded eagerly, threading one hand in his hair. Lost in a sea of sensation, she clutched her other hand at his back as she rapidly approached her peak. Luke dropped his forehead to her shoulder now and he seemed to lose control completely. She could feel herself getting very close, her quiet moans growing louder. Then she tensed, choking out Luke's name as she was pushed over the edge and the waves of pleasure washed over her. He followed her moments later, and she heard him groan her name into her shoulder before he collapsed. Lorelai kept her arms wrapped around Luke as her breathing began to slow, not wanting this moment to end.

When coherence returned, Lorelai rolled over on her side to face Luke, smiling at the satiated expression on his face. She captured his hand between hers and pulled it to her face, kissing it quickly. "And apparently, we are very good at that," she said with smug satisfaction, seeing Luke grin at her in return. "Should have done that years ago," she continued softly as a faint feeling of regret for those lost years rose within her.

An indecipherable expression crossed Luke's face, but then it cleared and he smiled back at her. "We're here now."

She smiled in return and replied, "Yeah, we are."

Later, they lay closely together in her bed. Lorelai rested her head on Luke's chest with one leg thrown over the both of his, and his arms were wrapped around her tightly. As she drifted towards sleep, Lorelai felt a wave of contentment wash over her. It felt like the completion of what had been a very long journey. In the recesses of her mind, she secretly hoped that it was also the beginning of another journey that would take a lifetime to complete.

"Lorelai?" Luke muttered her name softly as he played with her hair.

"Mmm?" she murmured sleepily, opening her eyes for a moment and lifting her head to look up into his face, before resting her head on his chest again.

She felt Luke place a soft kiss on her forehead and smiled when she heard him murmur, "Welcome home."

* * *

_This time, the eternal question of whether it was 'to be or not to be' finally yielded the correct answer. For Luke and Lorelai, it seemed they were 'to be' and the fork in the road led to something better than friendship. And, because of a proposal that never was, an engagement ring that never was and a cruise that never was, the story of Luke and Lorelai finally had the 'When Harry Met Sally' (sex inclusive) ending. _

_As a result, for Lorelai, Jason Stiles would always remain merely the annoying 'Digger' from summer camp and her father's business partner. Nicole would still have her sockman, but she would not have to commit adultery to get him. Luke and Lorelai would still break the church bells. But the only fight they would have about Luke moving would be the one eight months later about whether Luke's singing fish would be joining the two of them (and Rory during the holidays) in the Crap Shack. Although the renovations for the Dragonfly would still be messy, complicated and expensive, there would, at least, be no meltdown in the park. Luke would already be there to give Lorelai coffee in the morning and would be there to sign for the sink to prevent it being sent back to Canada. And when Luke stayed in lucky room number seven during the test run, this time he would, in fact, get lucky (and in a 'on a table, like in Bull Durham' way too). _

_The road would not be without potholes, of course, and it would not be a fairytale life. There would be plenty of other opportunities for meltdowns. There would always be Christopher and Richard and Emily and Liz and TJ and Jess to cause unwanted complications. There would still be arguments, misunderstandings and insecurities. There would also be the inevitable conflicts that would take place when two independent, headstrong individuals tried to merge their lives. But the good times would far outweigh the bad. _

_There would be a marriage. There would be a whole package. And there would be waltzing._

_**Fin**_


End file.
